


mascara

by Ryah_Ignis



Series: Season 13 Codas [10]
Category: Supernatural, Wayward Sisters (TV)
Genre: 13x10 Coda, Finally, oh thank god something passes the Bechdel test
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-19
Updated: 2018-01-19
Packaged: 2019-03-06 16:58:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,026
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13415634
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ryah_Ignis/pseuds/Ryah_Ignis
Summary: “I’m new at this,” Patience says in a rush, like she’s unused to admitting that sort of thing.She probably is.  Of course.  She can probably do everything perfectly.“I’m so sorry.”Her voice breaks on the last word.  This time, Claire can’t just look away.  Instead, she sits down on her bed—well, Patience’s bed right now, anyway—and pats the spot next to her.  Patience follows her lead, still trying to fight back the tears.  It’s a losing battle.Claire throws a crumpled up t-shirt at her. “I don’t have any tissues in here.”Patience sniffs. “I’ve noticed.”The girls talk about Kaia, and share the guilt.





	mascara

Usually, writing calms her thoughts.  Back in school, English had been the only class she’d been able to deal with.  But right now, it feels like her brain won’t stop buzzing no matter how many times she recounts the hunt. 

“I was wrong.”

Claire tucks her pen away into her notebook and stows that in her go bag.  She always keeps it packed, but with the hooded…things breaking into Jody’s house, it feels more necessary than ever.

“Huh?”

In the doorway, framed by the warm light from downstairs, Patience bites her lip. 

“Can I come in?”

For a moment, Claire considers telling her no.  Back in school, she hated girls like Patience.  The ones who thought their lives were so hard because they took six AP classes or because their volunteer dates with the National Honors Society conflicted with debate practice.  They didn’t know the meaning of _hard_.

But Patience killed a monster today.  Her first. 

“Yeah, all right.”

Patience ducks into the room, arms hugged around her middle like she’s trying to shrink into herself, to disappear.  The girls Claire always hated never acted like that.  They filled up space, demanded attention.  Okay.  So maybe Patience is different than those girls. 

“I was wrong, in my vision.  I thought it was you, but it wasn’t.”

Her eyes fill with tears.  Claire averts her own eyes, but she can still see Patience in the small mirror hanging on the wall.  The other girl tips her head back, blinks the moisture back into her eyes.  Claire recognizes the technique; it’s the best way to stop your mascara from running.

She discovered that while sewing up her own arm behind a dumpster.  She can’t help but think Patience learned it differently.

“I’m new at this,” Patience says in a rush, like she’s unused to admitting that sort of thing.

She probably is.  Of course.  She can probably do everything perfectly.

“I’m so sorry.”

Her voice breaks on the last word.  This time, Claire can’t just look away.  Instead, she sits down on her bed—well, Patience’s bed right now, anyway—and pats the spot next to her.  Patience follows her lead, still trying to fight back the tears.  It’s a losing battle.

Claire throws a crumpled up t-shirt at her. “I don’t have any tissues in here.”

Patience sniffs. “I’ve noticed.”

It’s funny, how seeing someone else fall apart can be enough to pull you together.  Claire still remembers the first time, sitting in their living room with her mother as she smashed each and every little ornament in the place.  She’d been the one to take Mom’s hand in hers and bandage up the cuts.  And even though she’d been scared and alone, she’d shoved it down and worked through it.

 “I’ve spent so long repressing it.  And I can’t help but wonder if maybe—if I’d explored this curse…gift…whatever it is—she’d still be alive.”

Patience’s hands curl into fists on her thighs.  Claire hesitantly brushes her hand over one of hers.  A tear splatters on her knuckles.

“I’m sorry,” Patience says, voice rough. “I’m an ass.  You were there.  You saw.  I came in here to apologize and now I’m—I’ll go.”

She starts to get up, so Claire snatches her wrist and pulls her back.

“It’s not your fault.  Like you said, you’re new at this.  Mistakes happen.”

The words taste like ash.

Because, okay.  She gets that Jody probably would want her to bandage up Patience’s hurts like she once patched Amelia Novak’s, but she’s so tired.  And right now, she deserves to cry, too.  But she can’t just yet.

“How do you do this?” Patience asks.

Claire shrugs. “It’s a job.  You do it.  Sometimes you save people.  And sometimes…well, sometimes you don’t.”

The thing is, she’s never really lost before.  She’s only ever put herself in danger, or watched it all go down from the car while Jody did the killing.  She’s never dragged an innocent along behind her.  She’s always been able to drive off into the sunset like a hero in a cheesy movie.  She hasn’t had to deal with—with this.

Patience nods. “Yeah.”

They sit in silence for a few moments. 

Then, she speaks again. “Anyway.  I just wanted you to know that this wasn’t your fault.  At least not completely.”

And then, the dam breaks.  Claire struggles valiantly for a few moments before the tears slip out.  Kaia had spent her whole life running from the creatures in her dreams.  And then they had chased her into the waking world and killed her.

“Here.”

Patience holds out the t-shirt.  Claire takes it, wipes her nose, tilts back her head so the tears don’t make her mascara run.

“I didn’t think.  And it got her killed.”

She bets a girl like Patience, the kind of girl that wears sweater vests and probably keeps a to-do list in a binder somewhere would never decide to charge headlong into anything in her life. 

Maybe Jody will be glad to have Patience moving into her room.  She won’t have to worry as much anymore.

“You weren’t thinking because you cared.  You wanted to save Sam and Dean, and you did.” Patience smiles, small. “They saved me, too.  And from what Jody told me about them, they’ve saved a hell of a lot more than that.”

Claire can’t help a tiny laugh. “You don’t know the half of it.”

She rubs her sleeve over her nose, grimacing at the snot.  To her surprise, Patience doesn’t look disgusted.  Instead, she pats Claire on the shoulder and rises to her feet.  The calm, cool collected girl that Claire probably would have hated in high school returns.  Patience swipes under her eyes twice, smoothly clearing away the tears.

“Jody says she’s ordering in from that Chinese place you like.  So if you want to come downstairs, you can.”

Patience squeezes her shoulder before she disappears out the door.

Okay, maybe she isn’t half bad.

Claire straightens her hair and her jacket before she braves the stairs.  By the time she meets Jody’s eyes, she has a smile on her face.


End file.
